Find Your People

You might think we’re living in the Great Depression, the way these women operate. One afternoon, they showed up with bags full of clothes, spreading them out across the dining and living rooms, neatly sorted by size. I thought, What in the world is going on? It was a clothing swap. Each of the five women had cleaned out their closets, and by the end of the day, they each went home with like-new outfits—or "fits," as they're called now. It cost nothing but a few hours of time, a little laughter, and some good conversation.

Then there's their dinner swap, which is pure genius. They buy groceries in bulk and each person prepares five identical meals. They exchange four of them with the others, and just like that—a week's worth of healthy, delicious dinners, ready to go. No fuss, no last-minute scrambling. They even thrift for casserole dishes and big jars, skipping disposable containers and the hassle of tracking down missing Tupperware.

I bet you're already thinking of four friends you could invite to start your own dinner swap, aren't you?

My daughter, Lacey, and my daughter-in-love, Blythe, have found their people—three other women in similar life stages who share their values. They do life together: sharing joys, sorrows, encouragement, and even caring for a sibling group after school when their mom needs a break. No drama. Just community, pure and simple.

Your people are the ones you count on—family, friends, neighbors, coworkers, your faith community, teammates. Social connections are easy to make, but how do you know when someone is truly your person? When you're with them, ask yourself:

• Do I genuinely enjoy our time together?

• Are they kind and encouraging with both words and actions?

• Can I be my authentic self?

• Do I feel at peace in their presence?

• Do they support me when I grow or change?

If you find yourself answering "no" to any of these, it might be time to reflect. Why give your precious time to someone who drains your energy or doesn't treat you with the respect you deserve? If it's family, setting healthy boundaries can make a world of difference. You deserve relationships that nourish your soul. Yes, you really do.

I’m not here to tell you how to live your life—well, maybe just a little. I just want to encourage you to be your authentic self and surround yourself with people who lift you up.

We are wired for connection. We live, grow, and thrive in community. So, who are your people?

— In gratitude, Shelly